In the wee hours, I don’t know when I slept. The knock on the door for morning tea broke my slumber… “Di…hot tea, refresh yourself”…maid Shyama was standing in my bedroom…it was eight o’clock… I gathered myself and after tea hurried to get ready to see off Ashwin…the schedule departure of the flight was 2: 30 pm…I drove to the airport to meet my love, the feeling to see him off wasn’t easy for me but still, I had to for the heck of our future…Ashwin’s eyes were also searching for me in the parking area… My heart beat a thousand times seeing him and I blushed &cheeks were red… he sat beside me and scanned me from top to bottom naughtily .my eyes could not meet his. I felt the warmth of his breath close to me. For a few minutes just glances were exchanged we didn’t say anything. The feeling of leaving made me desperate from within & I wished to rest my head on his shoulder to feel his close proximity but I couldn’t dare to…we shared a relationship which was pure & there was the place to touch or feel closeness physically… but we touched the soul of each other. I gifted him a bouquet of five roses and a small Ganesha with a card scribbled…” it’s for you My Love”…. he too became emotional, just crushed my hand in his. No words. I felt like melting, he kissed me softly… I couldn’t resist… We were lost in each other.…I don’t know how I dared to rest my head on his shoulder…this was the first time that we got so close to each other..bcoz we both knew that we won’t be seeing each other for the coming three years… Thanks to technology …these days there are so many options for regular interactions whether one is overseas or in country but in our times postal system enjoyed monopoly & letters were the medium of interaction and it took quite a long time but the fondness was much deeper those days because of long absence and the heart knew the pain of absence, it is truly said, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder”….hearts in love longed for the letters and waited for the postmaster… but today because of connectivity distance has been snapped everyone is in reach irrespective of distance globally all are connected hence the present generation doesn’t know the value of absence nor the longing exists and many times the relation lose their strength with time… the fondness doesn’t develop what I see around. Every relationship needs time to nurture like seeds, it doesn’t grow into trees at once they need time, space and care to grow, same is the case of human relations even a mother develops a connection with her child by nurturing the baby in her womb for nine months…but in this fast pace people forget this truth…conclusion. Breakups….in our times even we had grievances with each other but due to lack of connectivity it wasn’t able to express instantly and within the passage of time, grudges are forgotten& longing deepened. In present scenario, it is contrary if certain things or expressions are disliked a phone call or drop of SMS is enough to snap one another & relationship does not have time to grow out of bounds & commitment lacks.
“Sorry, Divya…”
“Y sorry dear”
“I lost control on myself; the feeling of separation couldn’t resist me from touching you…” I wanted to tell him that I loved his closeness but lips remained sealed… It was 2 pm…the time to let away my love to fly overseas very far from me… Since we met, this was the time that we were in each other company but time passed in deep silence… but this silence spoke more than words…he handed me a red rose and a key ring of heart-shaped “Ashwin” embossed on it and left for boarding…he waved me till I was in sight… Tears flowed down which were suppressed by me. I drove back lost in his thoughts. Weeks seemed like months but gradually I composed myself to get myself back in the routine… I had to achieve my goal. I was at the threshold of it & had to compete… a sincere promise was given to Ashwin.
After a fortnight… I received Ashwin’s letter….I too had posted long letters to him… I read several times till each word written was on my lips…this distance helped me to discover the unseen dimensions of Ashwin which were more adorable & above my expectations…really he was a man who deserved to be loved & trusted…exchange of letters slowly diminished the distance…his presence was felt near me and my admiration knew no bounds… I was growing in his love. And I felt his presence in the breeze of springs…life seemed to be more beautiful and pure… spring adds beauty to the trees, plants, and new colorful flowers blossom adorning the earth… same way Ashwin’s love was nourishing me… nurtured me and life bloomed… a carefree girl changed for the best (I felt so)… I explored many areas of myself which were unknown to me…weeks passed. Months passed… years rolled by…
Ashwin sent me his snap…Guy transformed into a Handsome Man… On my snap…he remarked, “Hey beautiful…Lady…Glowing. Is this glow of my love dear?”
I dearly wished to write that I was glowing in his love “dear” but inhibitions hesitations stopped me from writing this fact… but I longed to disclose in his presence.
I cleared my graduation with distinctions and I enrolled myself for Master’s Degree. My parents were in lookout for a suitable match for me… My Father, Mr. Prakash Chandra was an engineer and held an esteemed post in PWD…my parents dream revolved around me I been their single child. I knew that they were searching frantically as in eighty’s, 21-22 yrs. was considered apt for the marriage of a daughter… My mother was well aware of my love but I waited to disclose it on D Day… the day when Ashwin will land in the country… I was sure of Ashwin but wished that the initiation should be from his side to ask my parents for my hand…
Ashwin arrived in the town today a gap of three complete years and he rang me from the airport before starting for home, his parents desperately longed to see their son. Hearing his voice I felt a bang in my heart…I was dancing at the tune of my heart…it was a totally a new experience which rejuvenated my every nerve sending signals of love…ignited my soul… blushing red and hot… Deliberately I did not go to airport bcoz I felt shy to face him… I had scribbled my heart out while exchanging letters & now I felt shy… I wished to see his initiation to meet me and feel the unfeeling wonders…
He arrived at my place at 4 pm on a motorbike. I composed myself, I wished to see his reactions… Our glances met and smile spread on our lips but I felt motionless as if I was fixed at one place… My Mamma was also there… Seeing our gestures. She left for the kitchen to prepare something special for Ashwin… He came near & whispered. “Hey Divya, you look wonderful…………. beyond my imagination…more beautiful than before, my love is glowing ” & crushed my hands into his leaving my body tingling. We went on to the terrace; there was a lot more to share unspoken feelings.
In eighty’s we did not have the freedom to sit alone in the company of a boy, so the terrace was safe…
“close your eyes”, my lap was filled with gifts and roses, I felt as if I am floating in another world, dream come true, it said a lot about our relationship…sign of love…admiration…..
His looks had changed, no more a lanky guy but very composed well dressed… a dark mustache adorned his personality. My heart was singing & dancing in his company. Now days seemed shorter in his company. Time ran out quickly. Always we felt short of time in each other’s company…this was longing of our heart….now I knew the passion of love which kindled in my heart & a glow on my face.
“Absence had made the heart grow fonder & Now Presence had strengthened it”
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The beautiful feeling is love