Book Review: Antar Samriddhi Ki Aor! #Meditation

Title: Antar Samriddhi Ki Aor
Author: Mrs. Ranjana Gaur
Genre: Spiritual
Publisher: Kausthubh Prakashan
ISBN: 978-93-82666-52-3
Format: Paperback
First Edition: 2018
Pages: 240
Price:  525
Source: Author Copy
Cover Design: 3.5/5
My Ratings: 4.5/5.
About the Author:
The author of the book, Antar Samriddhi Ki Aor is Ranjana Gaur. She was born in 1953 in Ranchi, Jharkhand. She started her career with Patna Radio Station and her artistic & creative skills helped her to fetch fair chance to act in theatre, IPTA, and Doordarshan. She has done Masters in Reiki Healing and from there, her inclination towards spiritualism raised its head.
Her meeting with her spiritual Guru in 1990 after reading his Guru’s Guru Autobiography, it changed her perspective and her interest in spiritualism deepened. Her inner meditative energy awakened and her interest developed her meditative powers and to see the things differently with an essence of positivity.
By the blessings of her Guru, she was appointed as a Meditation teacher and she took the reins in her hand, sharing and imbibing the teachings of her Guru.
She believes in the power of mediation and she says that it helps to realize one true self and a power to overcome negativity.
Review:
The book, Antar Samriddhi Ki Aor is a beautiful chain of the process of meditation. Spirituality is within all of us. We have to just discover and recognize it. Till you don’t recognize, you see life as a heap of happiness and struggles. You love the times of happiness but get overburdened or depressed during the phase of distrust. The author in her book has tried to explain the facts of life illustrating live examples around us and how to deal with it with a faith to overcome via meditation. The meditation has the powers to repel negative energy or transforming it into positive energy.
The meditation is not an easy exercise as it appears but by following it in routine and increasing the duration slowly will invoke interest in the process. The bad thoughts or negative pressures will leave the mind, body, and soul and in positive energy will start building up inside. The positive energy uplifts spiritualism and helps people to accept the challenges without any fear or hiccups.
She has explained how to start meditation, how to benefit from meditation and has given examples from her life. The various interactions she had with people, her own experiences from day to day life, the reactions of people in different instances and how she dealt in her life and how she taught her students to overcome.
The students were not school going kids but adults who required support to understand the realms of meditation and what actually spiritualism is. People believe that to attain spiritualism and practice meditation, one has to renounce the world and become a saint.
The author, Ranjana Gaur has honestly explained that within the normal pursuit of life maintaining a normal life, one can easily practice meditation and enjoys its power. The power of meditation is strong and useful. It changes the attitude and improves perception, the power of perceiving things, diminishes fear of losing and helps in accepting the facts of life.
To know more about the subjects, buy the book, “Antar Samriddhi Ki Aor” and discover the ways and techniques that she has mentioned to follow and her stories from her daily life. The stories are interesting and intriguing.
I have finished the book but still, I am not delving deep because I want you all to buy the book and read for yourself.
My Take:
I received the copy from the author and read thoroughly. I was inspired by her thoughts and it did help to change my ability to perceive knocking negativity down. I do believe in meditation powers and my father got a chance to attend her meditation classes and it helped him in the bouts of Parkinson. I highly recommend this book and request to practice meditation. It has the power to cure diseases, enhance mood and liven up life by energizing our soul. Give time to yourself every day and recognize your power and awaken your inner consciousness.
To Buy books, Amazon: Click here
Image Credits: Ila Varma & Ranjana Gaur.
Reviewer: Ila Varma.

Disclaimer: It is an honest review, no biasedness. I believe in the powers of meditation and spiritualism and could connect easily with the author’s thought process and her writings.

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Those Innocent Faces!


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Since a year, I am engaged with a NGO to help the unprivileged class, who cannot make his living by his own effort because of old age and physical disabilities. Simultaneously, time to time, we visit orphanage to distribute snacks or items that they require periodically.

Our dreams are embedded with our NGO, but it is in an infancy stage and a minuscule number support us in this race. 
I dream to walk miles before I sleep.
My observation shook me from within when I first stepped inside the orphanage. There were small children from the tender age of 4 to 18 years. 
When they gathered inside the campus to meet us, those innocent eyes that gazed at us were mostly of Girls, only 5 boys were there among the crowd of 50.
The disparity in number of gender triggered queries inside me.
Why the numbers of Girls is so high in orphanage?
Reason?
Reason?
A fine reason settled inside me and my conscience supported the reason.
Are these Girls abandoned by the parents?
Are these Girls borne by the Moms out of wedlock or result of outraged modesty of girls?
My inner conscience said yes and my soul was shocked to watch those innocent cute faces. A hollow smile writ large on their faces.
What was the fault of these innocent souls?
Humans are judgmental and they love what they prefer. But, how God can be so cruel with them?
I have seen people asking for children, who aren’t blessed with a child. They are not on the page of choice of gender rather they pray to God to bless with a child. Their only choice is child, Boy or Girl doesn’t matter.
How come God blesses these cursed souls, who don’t have care for a girl child?
I was moved at the sight of those innocent faces of cute girls, each had its own beauty and charm. The life that they are gifted with, has a tag of orphan but my mind dwindled in conflict, “are they really orphan.”
My soul was not ready to accept. A feeling emerged that they are tagged orphans due to the compelled ignorance of their parents and extended family members.
Woman is known for her unconditional love for her child and what are these woman made of who abandoned their new-born at the mercy of none.
Science and technology is advancing each and every moment but still the numbers at orphanage growing and that too of GIRLS….pathetic.
It was a trying moment for me.
I want to do a lot for them to bring happiness in their life but I cannot do for all because of my limitations, personal and financial.
I have vowed to help them periodically by distributing stationary items, clothing, food articles etc.
I along with my accomplice and my children distributed snacks among them.

While leaving, I enquired what they want in my next visit.
Most of them said chocolates and colour pencils.
They bid us goodbye with a Big Thank You note and See You Again.
Hopefully, will visit soon but I pray to God in silence to hold the numbers of Orphans.
Why to bring them in this world to be looked upon as an object of sympathy?
Many questions keep rising in my head shaking my belief on humanity.
I have scribbled my feelings that I encounter with in my solitude. I share the turmoil that churns within me on the subject. No offences to any social or political people.

This post is published for #OpenNTalk Blogger’s League By #BlogAMile

team hosted by @Gleefulblogger & @Wigglingpen in association with SummerBarnVedantika HerbalsNyassa, & Explore KidsWorld.”

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I Raised My Son by My Life Experiences! #Parenting

I became Mom when I was waving goodbye to my late teens. I was very happy to hold my child in my arms.
I could not sum up my emotions in words, because no amount of words could suffice and express my inner happiness.
While holding M, I vowed few things; I won’t raise my hand on him, I will never scold him in moments of my anger, and will habituate him to eat all that is offered in his plate.
There were valid reasons behind these vows and I had learned the lesson in a hard way from my life and I did not wish to repeat it in future.
Let me explain the reasons for the vows to understand what I really meant.

I was quite emotional since childhood and if I was slapped or coaxed by parents and extended family, it hurt me a lot and I used to feel bad. The feeling that sailed in my mind was, why my family don’t try to explain me coolly when I am wrong instead of raising a hand. In our time, we were raised in such an atmosphere, where questioning or reasoning with parents was not allowed, so we kept mum.

When I conceived and was in a family way, I chose to be a parent, who can give the child the freedom to express his emotion and my first rule would be to adhere to explain the things clearly to the child, instead of taking the path of slapping.

Secondly, why I vowed not to get angry with kids when I am in temper for other reasons. I was raised in a large family and my Mom had to face unlikely situations. Forty years back, DIL could not even think of answering back or making faces if scolded or remarked by elders. Not always, but there were trying moments when we became victims of her wild temper. She felt sorry afterward but only after we were offered on the altar.
Lastly, never to encourage to become a picky eater. I was the eldest child of the family and I did not eat easily. Family members allured me with my favorite food so that I could have my food. This pampering turned out to be bad for me and I survived on a restricted diet of my choice. My Mom was not in favor to encourage my habit but being raised in a large joint family, she did not have much say and I got the freedom to be a picky eater. When I grew up then I realized that I had to suffer during outdoor visits and literally, I used to gulp down the food which I did not prefer. In our time, we were not encouraged to speak up even if you dislike, and I know how hard it was when I visited at someone place who was not aware of my habits.
While raising my son, I had to raise the hand to inculcate good habits in him and later, I realized that it wasn’t easy to spare the rod while disciplining the child. In the first and second instance, I used to explain things but still if he did not co-operate, I had to break my promise to discipline him. I did raise my hand when things were out of control and I had to take care that he does not go astray from the path and I was successful in disciplining him. My big protruding eyes were enough to control him, normally.
I did stand by my two vows, never ever lost my temper on him when I was in bad mood or hurt. The however tough or unfavorable situation would be, I handled them patiently and they could never judge what I was going through in the trying times.
I inculcated the habit of eating everything that was offered on a plate. It was not easy but I had to be strict in this term. I never cooked extra for my son. I fed him all that was cooked for everyone. In beginning, he made faces but I never bothered and gradually, he picked up the habit of eating everything that was cooked at home. This habit made him adjust in all the situations and never ever he complained. Later, he adjusted well in hostel life.
I raised my son with the experiences and lessons that I learned from my life.

My experiences say that being Mom is a wonderful experience and a woman is full of affection for her flesh. To discipline the child, at times, she has to act as an enemy and for that, she requires to be strong-willed and take impartial decisions to make the life great of her child.
What were your experiences as a Mom? Did you ever face the situation that I faced or did you check your parenting style by your experiences?

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Finally, I Decided to Let it Go!


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Off & on, my mobile beeped with a message, “Low Space.”

I clicked to delete the files but my fingers did not race much to erase. Gallery was full of images, some captured by me, some transferred by FB messenger, What Sapp images by friends and relatives.
I scrutinized them regularly but could not fathom courage to delete them or transfer in my laptop, I was indecisive.
Same was the condition with my mobile contact list, overloaded with numbers of support staff to friends, friend’s relative, well-wishers, associates and Who not, carpenter, shopwallah, autowallah and all wallah’s who came to my rescue even once in a lifetime.
My both Sim memory was full, phone memory was in suffocation…but I the stubborn, did not dare to delete or share on my Google Drive and the bare excuse, I had that I might need them in urgency.
Regarding images, I had transferred maximum on my laptop, still I kept most of them especially quotes, images of my children and the clicks that I captured of nature. All were close to my heart and I did not want to lose any.
Now, my mobile phone started acting weird just like me. It consumed battery in few hours and in mid-way of my daily shopping or to market, my mobile ran out of battery and went dead.
I make sure that my mobile is in working state when I go for shopping or out of house, so that I can reach my people if required in case of emergency or if I need any assistance of any sort.
I sought advice from few of my close accomplice and they suggested me to format.
One evening, I was sitting idle and that day, I made up my mind to format the phone at any cost so that it breathes easily and don’t go dead even after been charged up to optimum.
I asked one of my subordinate to help me in formatting.
He asked me if I had contact numbers saved in my Gmail account and I nodded in affirmative without paying much heed to what actually he said. The same he asked for other stored details and I said…LET IT GO.
He punched the button to format and till I realized I had not saved all, ALL WAS GONE IN ONE GO.
Now, I started asking figuratively, is this there in the phone or not and he laughed out loud and said that your reaffirmation made me to format without saving.
I was in melancholy for some time and felt sorry for the details that I had lost and was in distress n despair.
Suddenly, realization set in and an inner conscience spoke aloud, “Hey, what are you doing? Moaning at materialistic things. Pause and think, what all you have lost in past and did they stop you from moving forward?”

I accepted that at times, it is better to release the things that we have captivated for long and not able to let it go. All things materialistic or non-materialistic, life or lifeless have a fixed span of life and one day, we have to LET IT GO.


My mobile was not breathing properly because it was bowed down and it called for free space to respond else it would have collapsed one day, earlier than its assumed life span.
Now, I feel, the action taken was Right else I would have never allow to release if it would have been under my control. I was so obsessed.
Now, my mobile is not panting with heavy breaths and is amicable with me.
This LET IT GO practice made me realize that it is not so difficult to part ways but in our thoughts, we are so much screwed up that we don’t dare to take risk of losing.

 This post is published for #OpenNTalk Blogger’s League By #BlogAMile

team hosted by @Gleefulblogger & @Wigglingpen in association with SummerBarnVedantika HerbalsNyassa, & Explore KidsWorld.”

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Ways to Make Summer Holidays Interesting for Kids!

Moms get scary & restless at mere thought of approaching summer holidays of kids, whether she is a working mom or stay at home. Both dread at the thought of a long summer vacation of kids. Children are overjoyed & go berserk.
The children plan a long To-do-list in vacations. One month ahead, they start dreaming how to roll out their plans in coming holidays.
No issue of getting scolds from Mom & Pa for not getting off bed in early mornings.
No tension of daily homework.
Fewer Studies, More Playtime, Watching TV Shows, Playing virtual games, visiting friends and families, excursion, blah, blah, blah.
They are so busy in their own world of celebrations, not able to sense growing dread on the faces of their Moms.
I have created the scene which happens around especially in nuclear families, where Mom has to tackle lot of things, home, kids, office, external & internal affairs. These days, Pops do share the responsibilities, still Mom care is a large & hectic business.
Rewind, go back in your childhood days. You too was same as your kids, rather I would say, kids of today are more civilized compared to our childhood days. Hope, you all agree with me.
Chalk out feasible routines, easy for you as a Mom and the best for your kids.

Plan an Excursion


Plan an excursion with family. Book the tickets just after the vacation resumes…you will be wondering, why am I suggesting to start the vacation with an excursion.
Reason, kids are full of energy to celebrate their vacations. If they stay back, it will be tough to manage them indoors.On outing, their untapped energy will be exhausted in a positive way. You both will get break from your regular chores. Whole family will have great fun together, stress will disappear.
When you return after excursions, you will be filled with zest to do something better. Mind will be relaxed & fresh, kids can test your patience.
Kids will slowly settle down after fun of excursion and can be manageable.
For Working Moms

If you are working, pack your kitchen with readymade or homemade snacks, children need some delicacies to munch.

Pack your fridge with their favourite fruits, Mangoes are the favourite of children, squashes, sauces, jelly and ice-cream to spend their hot days with cold delicious delicacies.
For Stay at Home Moms



Keep grocery stock ready at home, the children can relish on the savories prepared by you. Here, I am being bit partial, giving freedom to working Moms to choose readymade stocks.  Mama. Be ready to display your culinary skills, this vacation. Normally, during school days, stress is more of studies and keeping up with the time-table, for both Mom and kids. During vacation, toss the time table, use the relaxed schedule to cook your children’s  and self-favourite dishes. It will be fun if you engage your kids to help you in chores, such as baking, laying down tables or any other fun activity. To make the vacation memorable, throw a small picnic party with their friends & neighbours. Wide smile on their faces will steal your heart.
Engage in Fun-Activities

Arts & Crafts Classes





Discover the interest of your child, make them invest in their favourite art & craft activity, such as painting, sketching, dancing & music, gardening,& other hobby classes. If you are adept in any art and craft, tutor them else admit them in summer hobby classes.

If your child has inclination in any art, he/she can explore on their own, encourage indulging. It will be a good pastime, energy being channelized in a  positive direction.
Summer camps



Nowadays, summer camps are arranged for the children during summer vacations. Sportive and interesting activities are taught with fun and play. The children learn up the things easily, medium of instruction is to learn via play. They enjoy and find engaging, grasp easily. I know of many summer camps where they teach how to take care of plants, first-aid, personal hygiene and self-grooming, how to arrange room and keep surroundings clean. Through play and skid, they are encouraged to weave interesting stories and enact on them. The activities are in sync with the age of the children. I have seen positive results in children attending summer camps, particularly the introverts shed their skin after interaction with summer camps, learn many new activities and etiquette at summer camp.

Word of caution, visit summer camps to see how they involve children in their activities before getting them enrolled. Summer camps are cropping up, so before getting them admitted, inquire about their credentials and authenticity.

Swimming Classes





It is fun for kids to play in water. Enroll them in swimming classes, it is one of the best exercise and fun and frolic for school going kids.

Encourage Reading Habits


In digital world, paperbacks are taking backseat but still I feel, children should be encouraged to read books. Reading books enriches vocabulary, instill interest, instigates creativity & imagination power. Buy books as per their age & interest, allot minimum one hour of reading hour every day. To make reading hour interesting, make them read in group of friends.
Encourage to Complete Summer Projects & Assignments


Ask them at what time they are comfortable to carry on their summer assignments and make them complete their assignments. Guide them but don’t write their projects and assignments. Let their imagination run and let them learn through trial and error. Make them understand that completing them throughout the stretch of vacation is desirable and easy instead of attending it at the last moment and getting stressed. Regular studies are beneficial for children.

Disclaimer:

The views expressed are my own, gained from my own experiences and observations. If anything offends you, do share, I am open to corrections and suggestions.

Lulling To Sleep! #Kids #MMM

Source: here

When the child is born, there is a great difference in the
temperature of the inside world compared to the world outside and it takes time
for the infants to settle in. These changes leads to changes in the sleep
pattern of the kids.
Mostly, we see that the new born sleep well in day hours and
are wide awake at night and it is a punishment for the New Moms to cope with it
and she becomes restless and tired & at times, loses her patience.
At times, I have seen that the babies are dull and sleepy in
day hours and proactive at nights and the couple exchange glances and anxiously
wait for their child to sleep and the smart kid finally relieves her Mom in
early morning hours.
This erratic sleeping pattern goes on for few weeks or few
months and gradually they adjust and sleep on fixed timings thereby giving
enough space to their parents and especially the Mom.
The day the woman conceives…lots of health issues crops up
with the pregnancy and she battles all the odd moments which takes toll on her
health for the bundle of joy.
The first trimester and the last one is scary and it poses
lots of issues but still for the sake of her child, she endures all the pain n
discomfort.
When the child arrives, he /she tests the patience &
power of endurance of her Mom and poses a fresh challenge each day for the Mom.
I am a Mother of two boys and both are two ends of a pole
though they gel well.
My elder son was quite calm n he slept for more than twenty
hours, so there was not much coercion in raising him.
Watching my son sleep for such long duration was not
considered normal by my MIL and she lectured me that we should keep him awake
for few hours else his mental & physical development will be affected.
One more reason I saw to his sound sleep was that I attended
all his chores ten minutes before his defined time, so he did not feel the need
to bother me.
So, I had great time while raising him not a single night was
disturbed.
The arrival of my second child was with a Bang…Bang…Bang.
The second child was proactive and slept only for few hours
and he kept me on toes at night. In day time, he used to play after been fed
but at night, he cried a lot and wanted to be in my arms.
I thank God for the patience that he descended on me that I
never got irritated and enjoyed their tantrums…it was the age factor. I became
Mom of two within 20’s and I never lost patience rather enjoyed the bliss of
Motherhood.
Gradually, I followed few tricks to lull him to sleep and it
worked well.
Change in Massage
Time:

I changed the timings of Oil massage from 6 to 7 pm to 10 pm
at night and changed to night dress after wiping him with warm water. He felt
fresh after the massage and tried to sleep.
Soft Light & Music:

After 8 pm, I switched off the tube light (LED & CFL was
unknown in those days) and soft music played in the background. My proactive
son gradually got sleepy in dim light and soft music. By the time of massage,
he would be half asleep and after massage, he slept peacefully.
These two changes brought great change in him and he slept
peacefully, consequence we two were happy. 😆😆
As they grew into kindergarten going kids, again their routine was
disrupted and their disruption perturbed my routine.
I have raised my kids on my own without any assistance of
support staff, so it was essential that their routine matched with mine so that
I could attend to my other chores of managing house, husband and kids.
After changing and feeding them, I took them to bed in noon
so that they could take a nap and I could finish my chores half attended.
I love reading so I purchased a good lot stuff of story
books and would read them aloud and they lulled to sleep in mid of story and I
tip toed to attend the other chores and arrange the things for evening and
night.
*Shukr hai…they did not inherited my instincts in sleeping else Motherhood
has been tough for me. Since childhood, I never sleep in daytime till I am ill
(It wasn’t tough on my Mom because I was raised in joint family).
This quality helped me in raising my kids. I never indulged
in any work till they were awake. I devoted my full time to attend to them and
when they went to bed, I was active managing family n friends.

This was my experience.

Do share yours. 💕

Writing this for #MondayMommyMoments.

***************************************************


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How to Conquer Anger? #MMM #AngerManagement #Moms

Source: here

I could not compete with the timings of Monday Mommy Moments and could not write on time due to other commitments but still I wished to write on this topic…Anger Management for Moms.

Here is my take on this topic.

Been sensitive, I don’t believe in yelling at children. I
know how it hurts so I never went to the extent of yelling or going mad with
anger while raising my kids.
From the very beginning of my life, I am cool with kids and
old but all hell break loose on adults…the reason that I sort out is that what
kids do, they do in innocence but adults deliberately indulge, so I lose
patience with grown-ups…though to some extent, I have managed controlling.
I had great share of anger outbursts in my childhood days
and I had promised that I won’t commit the same mistake with my kids.
And the day came, when I conceived and my happiness knew no
bounds and I got busy with the preparations to welcome my bundle of joy and
finally, the day arrived when I was holding my flesh in my hand…and the feeling
was surreal and no words can suffice to express my feelings.

I kissed him on his forehead and promised to him that you
will never be a victim of my anger and I will try my best to explain the things
when you are wrong, avoiding yelling at you to get rid of my frustrations.

I believe that the kids are fragile and we need to handle
with care.

His arrival in my life made me responsible and patient and I
knitted numerous dreams and all revolved around him…though as a wife…I
justified my presence…so I was successful in managing the both ends and both
were Happy.


Their happiness was my happiness and I felt contended.

Soon, I was Mom of two cute boys and my patience while
raising them proved to be a wonder. They turned out to be well-behaved kids. It
doesn’t mean that they were not into mischief, they were but within the purview
of limits or you can say that my No reaction on their mischief treaty helped
them to be docile.

The kids are smarter than Moms. When they find their Moms
losing their temper, then they deliberately involve themselves in mischief to
enjoy the tantrums of Mama…it’s my perception.
After finishing their chores, I used to sit with them n let
them play with their toys and puzzles and never went eccentric even when they
messed around, just watched them in silence that they don’t hurt themselves
hard…rest I hardly cared…Over caring too poses issues.

The early years were very relaxed but when they entered in
primary school, an unknown pressure built within me and I started losing my
temper at slightest pretext and they poor were victims of my wrath.

One fine day, I pondered over the situation and discovered
that sub-consciously, pressure was building that they study well and do well…so,
I was becoming over-ambitious. I stopped myself then and there…checked my
outbursts.

But there were instances where I had to do drama of been
angry to control their tantrums in their growing stage and it worked out…I
never yelled much rather explained them in their context to discipline them and
my silence worked in moulding them.

They too are my flesh and they  abhor yelling and been
spanked.

Few times, I spanked them when they were really at fault and
need to be corrected.

They were able to assess for what my anger built up and they
learnt how to avoid those instances…so our co-ordination was perfect…I was
their sole guardian while raising them and there was no interference from my
husband’s side…while I scolded them or checked them…It proved to be a liberty.

Normally, I see that while checking kids, the couple get at
loggerheads and their views on disciplining differs and this difference is
taken as advantage by the children, who are not at an age to judge, rather they
get hooked to the person, who is liberal and encourages even when he is wrong.
I never spanked or yelled at them in frustration or in mood
swings.

Where they need to be reformed, I never backed out, I was
there to correct them.

I wish to share my suggestion.

Many times, it happens that if we are in good mood and the
kid has done seriously something wrong, we overlook them in our fun time…and if
we are in bad mood and the kid is demanding something genuine, we spoil the
play because of our anger outbursts…and the innocent has to face the music.
This mood swings of Mom’s blots the kids for no fault of
theirs.

Remember a golden rule, however good mood you are in and
your ward needs to be corrected, don’t back out, then n there pin point their
mistake and ask them to correct sternly…and never make them victim of your mood
swings.

Give them a chance to distinguish between Right and Wrong.

My silence played wonders in raising them…now they are
grown-ups individuals and now if they deliberately go out of way, I yell at
them on top of my voice. They frown at me but never reply back rather when I am
cool they explain me patiently.

I request the existing Moms and would be Moms to work on
patience and anger management and always, remember your childhood days, it will
be convenient to tackle your kidoos.

Silence speaks more than yelling.

Whenever, you feel like yelling, start backward counting and
by the time you will finish the count, your anger will diminish.

Advantages of Not Yelling:

You will be happy and your family will be happy.

Kids will be friendly with you and will share
their secrets.

Your saved energy will kindle your Creativity.

Kids will grow into mature adults and will know
how to handle adversities.

Kids won’t learn to bicker or retaliate.

Many will say, it is easy to say than to be done. I too
agree but we can at least try for the sake of our children.

The image of a Mom is loving and caring then why to spoil
the image by yelling and getting angry on slightest pretext.

What is Anger?

It is a bottled up frustration and when one gets a chance,
they explode hurting themselves and others.
I am quite impressed by the words of Lord Buddha which runs
as under and this quote proved magical for me and it helped to master control on my
pangs of anger.
Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the
intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.
               

Linked with #MMM.

My Superhero!!! #Dad #FathersDay

                                                                                       Source

  
Indeed Dad is
a Superhero
for the kids because at the tender age, what he does for us
seems very Big to us and we accept
him as Superhero and try to imitate
his style.
Dad is a dad for the daughters and sons but a
daughter’s affection is more inclined towards her father in her initial years
of childhood and the sons are more influenced by Moms; I think more of
psychology works here…Let’s not delve deep.
I too was not an exception and since I gained
senses, I was more a Papa’s Beti than a Mothers and I remember at times, Mom
felt ignored and neglected.
My father was in Sales job so most of the time, he
was on tours. I missed him badly and would cry often for my Superhero.
When he came back, I tried to spend maximum time
with him and I was pampered by him. He took me along to his office when he was
in town. I accompanied him to market or wherever he moved.
Gradually, I started to imitate his acts and even
kept his secrets.
I went with him on short trips and he puffed outside
home. No one at home had a irk of it. We were in joint family system so my mother
too wasn’t aware though she suspected.
He asked me not to spill the beans and I dutifully
didn’t spill but often blackmailed him for getting new toys or things of my
choice…really, I kept the secret till high school and spelled out to my mother…when
he had left his habit.
He was fond of non-vegetarian foods and cooked
delicious items of non-veg…you can say, he was a marvellous cook…I too fond of non-veg foods
relished his cooked mouth-watering foods.
Being in Sales & Marketing, he often left the
house when I was sleeping and returned when I went to bed…the days he brought raw
non-veg food along, he would wake me up…his one call was enough to bring me
back from slumber…and I would religiously wait for my favourite food that too
cooked by my Superhero.
As I grew up, I tried to follow in his steps and
imitated his dialogues and style (he wasn’t aware of it).
I adored the way he drove behind the wheels and
would day dream to drive one day later in life and I did.
I helped him in the cleaning of the car…we had an
Ambassador, at times, when it did not ignite, he would make me sit behind the
steering and he pushed with others to ignite.
During holidays, I would play badminton and
scrabble
with him and at times, I caught him cheating…it was fair in games.
Despite all fun and pampering, he was a strict
disciplinarian
and his anger was worse.
When he would be at home in my school days, he
helped me to get ready for school, polished my shoes, ironed my dresses and combed
my hair into beautiful plaits…it was indirect help to mother but his small acts
made me happy.
He was good at English and he imparted lessons on
its usage and rectified my language.
We spoke Bhojpuri at home but he made sure
that while speaking in Hindi & English, the flair of the mother tongue doesn’t comes in.
As I grew, I started understanding his ways and I gradually drifted apart and maintained a respectable distance where I could not argue or discuss as I could in my kindergarten days.
He trained us to be independent and do all the
chores inside and outside home which included managing money, billing of
newspaper & milk and banks, school fees and other bills so that I learn the
value of money and be independent.
My mother had unknown fears and she never wished
that we travel alone…but my Superhero gave the privilege to travel alone when
we were at an age where we could differentiate between good or bad.
I hated making chappatis and was not good at making
them but he was the one who insisted me to prepare chappatis for him…it was more
of an order than request…so there was no option to turn down…now I understand
his motive. He believed that the things people hated to do should practice every
day and gradually the people will start loving…The day, I prepared rounded
chappatis, I was relieved from the duty.
He taught me to read books other than text books and
this gave way to writing. He would bring books while returning from tours.
He imparted knowledge about good and bad touch and
inculcated table manners.
It wasn’t a cake walk with my Superhero, at times
our ideas matched and we celebrated and when we opposed each other, we were at
loggerheads…still the journey was good.
What I am today is a package of contributions of My
Superhero Dad & Mom.

Linked to #MondayMommyMoments.

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Thankful Weekends #Thursdays #Life

As weekends is about to arrive, the mind starts
tickling of the youngsters, ready to gallop on the roads with racing bikes along
with friends. The day Friday is been associated with TGIF (Thank God, It’s Friday.) and the heart of the
youngsters starts beating for the approaching hours and the two grand days of
weekend.
A decade ago, I was not well-versed with TGIF but now at every nook & corner
of the metros and non-metros are ready for the show on Friday itself, which
reminds of the importance of Friday in the lives of students in higher studies
and hunks & girlies of the young employed age.
They don’t have much responsibility and in real
terms, they enjoy their life at the best on Fridays and resting on the weekends.
We, the family people breathe deeply on Fridays to
get ready for the next day with all the required weapons of cleaning, dusting
and mopping. 
Working couple have hectic Saturdays, aligning the
things of the house which often gets distracted from their places. The loads of
clothes looking at us with dirty faces to get loaded in washing machines and
bask in sun.
Today, I will brief you all, “How I Spend My Weekends” and why I am thankful for the
weekends and very ardently wait for it to arrive.
Friday late evening is the laziest day for me. After
work, I take a soothing shower comforting myself with my favourite lather and
get ready in one of my casuals in which I can breathe easily without getting
terrified of missing the creases.
I ardently wait for my better half who decides the
menu and location of Fridays…On this day, I don’t pay attention to my home and
kitchen…my fingers move on the playing list and the lights are dim so that I
can’t see the dust or the missing creases of the sheets & furnishings…I have
started believing  in TGIF.
M
arrives
from office and he knows me well and my overtures on Friday. At times, he decides
to cook non-veg for us or take me to some restaurants to savour on some
delicacies….and I go to bed early unlike other days, so Friday is a free day
for me to relax in my own terms.
On Saturday, I wake up early and strap myself with
all the amenities of cleaning the house, changing the furnishings and altering
the look of the whole house.
M
has his office and he tip toes of the house on time because I want full control
on my home and don’t tolerate interference of anyone.
First of all, I load the washing machine with the
clothes sorted out based on colour and fabric etc. Till it tumbles, I clean all
the cobwebs and dust off the doors, windows and grills. All the sheets &
covers are changed of all rooms & living room. All the decors & mirrors
are cleaned. Even soft toys are bathed.
By noon, the total cleaning of the house is done along
with the maid.
By the time, the cook cooks light meal for the day,
I creep inside the bathrooms to sparkle them and take a lengthy bath to refresh
& rejuvenate myself, brushing myself with ayurvedic powders.
After meal, comes the time to clean the kitchen
shelves, change the nappies and table mats and arrange all the things as per my
choice and need.
No rest in daytime. I keep my playing list of music
ON to boost my energy to manage the chores well.
The washing machine does overtime in weekends and
all the cleaning are over by late evening…then comes the washer man to collect
the clothes for further processing.

In evening, I give a clean look to my plant pots by
pruning and digging and sit in the balcony with my liquor tea.
When M arrives
in late evenings, he is awestruck with the sparkling look and sprawls on the
lounge breathing fresh look of our sweet home…he agrees that his Friday treat
works well.
Sunday is the day to laze around…wake up late and
move around lazily. We don’t take breakfast on Sundays, a grand lunch of
non-veg is prepared by both of us and we relish it hot with the side dishes of
raitas and sweets which we miss in weekdays.

After lunch and easy discussions of here and there,
when sleep envelops us, we aren’t even aware.

Sunday evening tea is prepared by M.
After tea, I change in one of favourite dress and
enjoy the evening with M, catching
few programs on TV or someone drops in & we close the Sunday with a light meal.
Ready for Monday to start afresh.
I feel thankful for the weekends, which gives me
ample Me time to excavate the house,
laze around and rejoice the days with full enthusiasm, anxiety at bay.
 Linked to Thankful Thursdays.
I am thankful to God for all his blessings.
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Teach Your Child to Manage Money! #Experiences

 
 
 
 
 
Parenting is the tough nut to crack and it needs a lot of patience and perseverance to tackle the kids and guide him on right track.
 
 
The unconditional love for our children makes us do the impossible things and Mom is always ready with, “I’M POSSIBLE”knocking impossibilities down.
 
 
Mine journey wasn’t easy. My patience and experiences of my life helped me to fare out well managing both my kids…in spite of heavy turmoil inside, I am able to be cool outside & I don’t have the habit of cribbing rather I abhor cribbers.
 
 
Many people believe that in initial years, the children should be given immense freedom and after a certain age, start curbing them. I am against this practice.
 
 
You have to do the groundwork in initial years and inculcate good values and show them the differences between right & wrong.
 
 
We all learn from trial and error and parents are there to identify and rectify their errors.
 
 
Children are innocent at heart but smart too and catch things easily and if they are left to leave on their own terms, then they will have great difficulty in later life and to keep them disciplined will be challenging.
 
 
Train them with good habits from the initial days of their childhood.
 
 
Managing money is not an easy task and the children should be educated on how to manage efficiently.
 
 
How I Taught My Kids, “Value of Money
 
I am sharing my very own experiences with my two kids. My hubby was lenient towards children and rarely does he lose temper. He believed in pleasing them by fulfilling their demands. I was against this and made him understand that he is pampering them and we will have a tough time to handle them in the future. Initially, he did not pay much heed to it but my constant effort changed his thought and he decided to back out.
 
 
I took the reins in my hand and implemented few rules to follow to Teach them the VALUE OF MONEY.
 
 
We say, MONEY IS NOT EVERYTHING but we all know HOW IMPORTANT MONEY IS.
 
  • Never fulfill all demands: The first & foremost rule is, never fulfill all demands of children else they will not understand its value and how tough is to earn a good sum. Simultaneously, they will learn the
    PRIORITIES OF LIFE and how to prioritize. Secondly, they will develop patience to deal odds of life.
 
My Experience: I was brought up in joint family where my Mum didn’t had the power to  tame me and my all demands were fulfilled.  
 
 
Consequences: Till today if my demands are turned down, I am hurt at
heart. I don’t put up my genuine demands fearing it might not be attended.
 
 
  • Buy Essential things: I see around that the people who are affluent and have several sources of income, they gift such toys and appliances to children which aren’t essential, rather it’s superfluous.
    You as a parent are spoiling them. Buy the things which are best for him as per his age and requirements. They will learn the VALUE OF MONEY AND THINGS.
 
  • Pocket Money: Fix a specific sum of pocket money for the children. Initially, fix a sum for a week and later on spread it for a fortnight & month. Ask them to spend on their toys, stationery, snacks and
    refreshments.
 
My Experience: When my elder son was in KG and the younger one in a nursery, I fixed a certain amount for a week to spend on ice creams, cold drinks, and snacks. I was amazed to find them saving from that meager amount. With that little amount, even we both got a treat from our children, such was the power of money management of those kids.  I pinpointed to my hubby who used to readily give in to their demands to watch how smart they are in spending their own pocket money. This habit inculcated in them habits of SAVING & VALUE OF PENNY.
 
  • NEVER DISCLOSE FAMILY INCOME: If you are on the affluent side, never disclose income to your children. At a tender age, they
    won’t understand the sweat behind the flowing income but will be ready to spend extravagantly. Parents too have to check their expense style. If you are extravagant in spending then you can’t ask your ward to be thrifty.
 
  • REWARD THEM: by buying gifts for them on special occasions and when they do well in studies or maintain discipline during vacations etc. Appreciate them & reward them by giving money to buy the
    things they love to buy or the parents can gift them that their children love to have in their possession.  Even you can gift them a pot of flowers and make them responsible for watering and taking care. This way VALUE OF CARE will be instilled in your child. These small acts will motivate them to do better and get surprise gifts.
 
I shared my experiences of parenting and what I learned from my life experiences.
 
My children are quite spendthrift and they know the VALUE OF MONEY IN LIFE.
 
Share your experiences.
 
 
 
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