With the passage of time our bond strengthened and we were a step ahead….we were glued to telephone more and meetings were occasional though Ashwin visited college to catch a glimpse of his lover blooming and on few occasions Mom invited him to our place..she knew that I missed him badly so for me she asked him to drop mainly on Sundays so that he could pass time with my Paa & develop a bond with him too..So Sundays were lovely when Ashwin dropped at our place and had lunch or dinner with us and we got a breather to spend an hour or so in solitude and that moment was quite precious for both of us & it’s cherished by me till today.

Gradually marriage arrangements were on peak in both the families both sets of parents were busy in marketing, chalking plans to make it a grand success and we two were over anxious and overjoyed that we two were going to spend our rest of life together soon after& there were numerous plans conceived in our hearts which we had to roll out after the wedding.

Our commitments of job and studies too were of concern & we had to do our best to secure our future. Life appeared beautiful & colorful but anxiety too gripped me over the thought of leaving my parents behind. I was lucky to get married in the same city but still, this thought perplexed me at times & tears rolled down.


I was in a fix…no choice before me…I wanted both my love & my parents…I believe that all girls go through this phase & it’s difficult for all to choose…& the norms of society is to leave behind the parents and accept the man of your life..even my Mom did the same..for me the anxiety was more been  a single child…whenever I felt low at the thought of leaving, my Mom was there to assure me & her assurances brought significant change in my mood..she was more of my friend than my mother & I would definitely miss her aura around me …her charm which enhanced my persona.

to be continued….. 



Rohan lived in Kolkata with his family, old parents, and siblings all financially dependent on him. He was the sole breadwinner of the family and very dominant personality.

He was not much educated, but carried his business well of readymade clothes near Kolkata port & earned nice sum to manage his family.

After closing his shop he used to sit with other mates for time pass and gradually he picked up ill vices of drinking, smoking, and gambling. Many times he felt that he was drifting on wrong track and wished to leave these habits which were making him weak but in friend’s circle, he could not control nor could he protest.

The man who was known for his dominant personality became the slave of ill vices. His family noticed the changes and even protested silently, they could not raise their voice as they were fed on the earnings of Rohan.

In the meantime, alliance came for Rohan’s marriage.

Rohan parents fixed his marriage as he was of marriageable age and thinking like most Indian parents do that after marriage boy will change after shouldering the responsibility of a wife and his children which is not true in many instances.

On an auspicious day, he was married. Few months of marriage went on smoothly, Rohan was very happy and was enjoying married life with her princess.

Family members were relieved…but it was short lived…again Rohan drifted into bad company and his good sum of earning was been spent on these ill vices and if wife protested he treated her worse, so his wife could not do much to control him.

In the meantime he was blessed with two kids …but his habit or behavior did not change much. Years passed, Rohan siblings were married off and all went out to settle independently, parents became weak due to old age and his wife not much educated submitted herself in taking care of her in-laws, kids, and husband.

Gradually, Rohan health started deteriorating and he could not work for late hours. Weakness was gripping him, his wife took him to the hospital for a check-up. He was advised for a total health check-up and to undergo several tests. Blood samples were collected for varied tests, with reports duo visited the doctor.

The doctor told him that he was inflicted with the deadly disease AIDS…the name itself sent shivers to the spine. He could not believe his ears…his wife was totally dumb…with disease AIDS…only one thing comes to minds of many…infidelity with the partner and nothing else… the question of loyalty???

The doctor examined him thoroughly and discussed with him in detail about the disease and how to cope up…at first, Rohan declined of any relationship established with strangers but his face spoke of all his misdeeds…it’s true one can lie to others but can’t lie to oneself. Now the reports spoke of his misdeeds which no one knew before except for few of his friends, who too were in the bad company….frequent visits to prostitutes for physical satiation & fun.

Rohan had never ever thought of that he will be inflicted with the same any day…today he felt like his world is shattering down in front of his eyes and the noises of it would make him deaf and dumb….for the first time…he felt weak before his wife, who could not mutter a single world…his wife stood still in state of shock and disbelieve…she had ever cooperated with Rohan to satiate his sexual urges even in times when she did not feel…totally committed and her husband is astray…she did not feel like saying anything….eyes welled up with tears…now these tears were hers…she had to live with it till the last breath of her life…she could not end her life boos of responsibilities of in-laws, her innocent kids…and of Rohan. Now she did not feel like accepting him as her hubby or life partner. But still she had to live with him…she was neither well educated nor her parents were financially strong to support her family.

She decided firmly that she will not share this with anyone…she felt betrayed and low…and the respect for her man vanished…he had played with the strings of faith…trust was no more the most important ingredient of a healthy relationship…she wanted to shout…she wished to run away. Far from the maddening crowds.

Rohan was perplexed…now he felt the pain of his deeds…the sexual urge on which he had pride …now he hated himself for it…but now nothing could be changed…he has to suffer…family will be there by his side but he had to bear the pain of disease  as well as curses of all…AIDS patients are not easily accepted…though people are afflicted due to other reasons as well the mindset is that the person is of loose character and is on the wrong path…all know the lanes of prostitution to be it leaders, police or society…all goes under their nose. But no one cares. But the day, one hears about AIDS…

whispers and murmurs take the round. He could not think. WHAT NEXT?

Economically he was backward. Sole breadwinner…never taught his wife the business ethics so that she could manage in tough days…his vision blurred…but now nothing could be changed.

Now he did not have the stamina to go out and put his shop…neither he had any such helper who could take care of his business…Old parents were struggling with their own life and this news of their son had shattered them into pieces….broken and helpless…they did not want to share with other siblings as they felt ashamed of it. Gradually he lost much weight and had to be transferred to hospital for the treatment…blood level was alarming…blood transfusion was done. He was reeling under medical observation…his wife was helpless, no funds in hand neither any support on which she could rely…god was testing her patience…continuously she prayed to god or cursed the god for making her life miserable….the kids were suffering…Her family members supported her financially as much as they could ..they too were not so well off…..but still they cooperated….but no one could share the Rohan’s sufferings…he had to bear the brunt alone…BLUNDER was done by one but the load whole family had to face…..Rohan was in hospital bed…unable to walk…the disease had drained his energy level and his immorality had brought his morale down…he laid on the bed still with eyes gazing the ceiling…blank face…nothing to say….within himself he was fighting…not for his life but for the mistake that he made without ever thinking of the consequence….and his false pride took him to this stage…that he lost the battle of LIFE….One fine morning, he breathed his last…he was freed from the suffering but the whole family had to face the what wrongdoing doings…a dark future laid ahead of Rohan’s wife & kids….and old parents helpless.

Disclaimer: Any person living or dead resembling is just coincidental. It’s a pure fiction though incident is about the issue cropping in our society


It was Friday evening…after my classes were over…I was crossing the big lawn of college, way back to home….I saw a tall shadow following me….  “ hey…how are you…” the same voice of the Senior intercepted my way…my heartbeats raced faster but my legs could not take a step forward…
“Ha…ha…ha…” he was laughing out loud and stood
beside me…. “Hi…don’t you want to know my name. I am Ashwin…Ur senior waiting for a favor from Divya darl….ing…”
“Divya, I know your eyes are searching me …accept this fact….I’m too in search of you. I like you…love you…and cannot live without you…” all said in one go by Ashwin as if he was waiting for this D day to confess…I was perplexed and could not utter a word.
He walked a few steps and asked me to accompany him but I moved forward…I was dumb but did not disapprove his way of confession…I liked
it…now I will say, I loved his way of confession!
Ashwin…Ashwin…Ashwin…the name was ringing in my ears. I could feel his close proximity….I felt everything beautiful and colorful within me, near me and around me…I found myself lost in his thoughts…if really it was “LOVE “ then nothing could be as beautiful as this, I was damn sure…This four lettered “WORD” brought wonderful changes in me…a carefree girl became conscious of her looks. Dresses…and a DESIRE to be watched by my Love “Ashwin”…I used to talk hours with my love in my thoughts.
I wasn’t aware if Ashwin felt the same for me, as I was developing the feeling for him.
My taste of colors changed drastically and started liking colorful dresses
contrary to my choice of sober and light colors…looked in the mirror often…my Mamma’s eyes sensed this change…It did not remain unnoticed from her
eyes…She read the changes easily in me and kept a silent vigil on me.
“Beta…what is it…” she smiled …a naughty smile which wanted me to share my feelings with her.
“What’s it Maa…” 
I said looking the other way it was very early to disclose….I was floating in colors of Love, but still was not sure for the other person…A…s…h…w…i……n……..
“Your tastes are on change….certainly, there is a reason for this change…it cannot go unnoticed from the eyes of a Mother, Divya darling!”

“There is nothing like that Mamma. If any day I feel so, you will be the first one to know…relax…the changes that you are finding me is the peer pressure you can say….all girls of my batch are very choosy about their dresses and looks and I find myself odd man out so trying to compete with the peer group…”
I tried to pacify her feelings. I know… I was lying but no choice was left with me rather lie though I too did not like to lie. Now I understood that we lie easily in the fervor of Love.
My whole wardrobe changed…new colorful dresses matching accessories…spent a lot at markets with my Mamma.
A Simple girl has changed into a graceful gal concerned more about her looks…attires……My step towards college gate raced my heart beats and I blushed more often. Every day our eyes met and smiles were exchanged before going to classes. I don’t know whether he was there deliberately or by chance….but every day it could not be a chance….started daydreaming in class…sometimes it was noticed easily by my batch mates or professors…
In lunch break. I went to canteen…it has become a routine affair… Ashwin was there with his friends…glances were exchanged that’s all…no greeting, though I longed to hear from him. This routine could not continue for more than a fortnight, but now I feel that a fortnight was like a year…nowadays guys don’t have the patience to hold themselves for a day or two
but in our days…People were more patient…and the reason behind this patience was that there were no computers. No mobile phones. No emails…no internet connections…the modes of communication available tested our patience…Landline phones. Trunk Calls…letter and postcards were the modes available in our time which really tested our patience.
9th day of March was the most important day of my life…As I entered the canteen, I found Ashwin sitting all alone at the last bench of canteen…one seat vacant near his side…He smiled and waved & asked me to join him …in gestures. No words exchanged…I longed for this day though I never took the initiative but never ever declined Ashwin’s approach. In few seconds I was standing near Ashwin.
“Hi…Divya…come …what you would like to have Tea or Coffee. Special tea or Espresso coffee. (Nowadays Cappuccino coffee in CCD’S) I myself didn’t know what happened to me when I was near Ashwin…all alone I used
to talk hours with him but when he was near me…I was a mute spectator….
“Come on…say something….I’m ordering espresso coffee hope you would like it”…he went to the counter to order…
I found a napkin on the table something was scribbled on it…it was my name written in different styles now I was sure that the fire of love was kindled at Ashwin’s end too…he was too under the same situation that I was in….Fallen in Love but still not much was exchanged within us… “US”…I was left
bewildered I was referring as US in lieu of I and him…Was this the effect of
love….I was getting romantic.
Ashwin was back with two Mugs of Hot Coffee …

He sat
beside me and I don’t know how and when we started but we were engrossed in
deep conversation…the boundaries between us had sublimed…and in seconds we seem
to be very much familiar with each other…it seemed that two friends have met
again after a decade or so and there were lots and lots to share
…talking…smiling and laughing at each other and I did not feel that Ashwin was a stranger to me….neither Ashwin took me as a stranger…we both were very much comfortable in each other’s company….there was so much to tell each other…list seemed endless…A canteen boy came to us and said that it was time for the canteen to be closed.

When I looked outside the window…I was surprised to see that the sun was about to set…
“Oh my god…I missed my classes…I will leave now Ashwin…I am already late…”
He nodded and asked my phone number…I wrote the number
on another paper napkin and gave it to him and the paper napkin on which my name was scribbled I kept it in my hand bag…I ahandbagt was noticed by Ashwin but he did not say anything.
I rushed out of the canteen in a hurry …I was already late for home and in campus, only few could be seen…my heart was thumping in my rib cage and the person near me could hear my heart beats thumping …I was
pondering and was busy in finding out a valid excuse to answer my mother’s
query for been late. For seconds, I forgot Ashwin or what we conversed…I felt
totally blank.
When I reached home….by god’s grace, I was spared by Mamma’s queries…She was not at home.

After getting fresh,  I sat on the rocking chair in balcony deeply engrossed in 
thoughts of my Love which was yet to bloom. 

to be continued….. 

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