Today, I was
feeling low and wanted to flip the pages of time when I was my real self
without any artificial enamors and true to myself.

I parked my
car near by the park and strolled inside. The sunny afternoon of winters was
soothing and I took a seat under the tree, the sun-rays filtering through the
branches were comforting my senses and I felt at ease.

I went into
the state of flash back and stopped at my sweet sixteen phase, for which each
teenager strives to reach and the movies show the crushes and infatuations and
romantic aura at 16 and every teenager dreams of it. I too was in the same
line, waiting to attain sweetness in my life at the sweet age of 16.

As I grew
up, my skin glowed, my crowning glory was in full glory and there was immense
radiance on my face. I too was puzzled to see myself in mirror. I had changed a
lot for good and my mother eyes were on me with a feeling of pride for my
emerging beauty and a fear gripped her seeing her princess spinning into young
nymph. I could sense her fear though I did not understand why she was growing
so possessive of me.

My body
curves got prominent and accentuated at right places and I gradually grew
conscious of my body and at times, I had to be conscious to carry myself and
especially in rowdy crowd, it was difficult for me.

I was in my
final board of Tenth and I had devoted myself to study but I secretly dreamt to
be a singer and wanted to pursue Fine arts but my parents were reluctant
because they did not see future of these subjects. They had the concept that
the traditional education can only give comfortable future. I tried hard to
convince them but I failed in my approach. I wasn’t daring to stand against
them or retaliate, so with heavy heart, I accepted their opinion. I shelved my
passion with a secret thought that I would pursue music in coming future but
never knew that a dreamer lives forever and a thinker dies soon. My thought did
not die but I murdered with my own hands supported by time factor.

Sweet
sixteen enters with beauty but it has its hiccups too, reality is very harsh at
times. The pimples are the woes of a nymph, she abhors but pimples adore nymphs
and tries hard on beautiful faces to fade their beauty. These pimples added
misery to my life and I hated to go on outings or party with pimples on.

As you grow
beautiful, parents go berserk and are ready to guard you all time and barge
deliberately in your loneliness and they did the same, at times, I grew
impatient and rowdy. It is the age where you need to handle many emotions and
different pressures of life and the fantasy and the dreams tears you apart from
reality.

The pressure
of exams, peer pressure to look better and the pressures of parents to be in
right frame just kicked me out of the required format…it was tough.

It is more
about balancing the act but it’s not easy to handle.

The idol
worship is intense at this age and the eyes that notices becomes the cynosure
of eyes and I was no exception. I loved to be noticed but never accepted.

The crush on
AB was unparalleled and I was crazy for him and I felt my beats racing when I
watched him in movies.

The mood
swings limited my interactions with family members and I insulated myself from
others when I dislike their views.

Today, I am
at rim of 45 plus and have seen life closely from all quarters and Dear Sweet
16, I want to tell you that it was the best part of your life where you had the
support of your parents n siblings to handle you when you stumbled and they
were always there to patiently bear your tantrums. In those days, Board exam
looked scary but after walking miles and miles on the topsy curvy lane of life,
I feel like laughing loud at my innocence, it was nothing compared to tough
things that one faces in life and can’t even express. 
The fear the parents had
about us were genuine as I feel now for my daughter.
I can’t go
back into the time so I will fulfill my ambition through my daughter if she
really wish to take fine arts as her career and will readily help her to pursue
her passion. The things that I left incomplete will be completed by my
daughter, I see a mirror image of myself in my daughter. She is going to
complete Sweet 16 next year and I am waiting eagerly for the day with pride and
fear. Time changes, people change but few things remains the same.
This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.


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