How to make your child Independent?
Independent child is a virtue to the parents and society if it is used in a right manner. A parents gives the right to independence to the child with a belief that the child will use it in a right manner. The responsibility lies on the child to keep up the faith.
Recently, I visited one of my friend and saw that she was busy in taking care of the chores of the child, who was near about 14-15 years.
I was quite puzzled and thought for a while whether to give sermon to my friend or not on the way she was treating her child.
She was over protective and over caring and this over care had spoiled the child, he was totally dependent on his Mom for all of his activities.
His school was nearby home, still she accompanied him in the morning and recess hours. She would feed him, helped him in his school work and again accompanied to play ground.
I couldn’t stop myself and blurted out in front of her child.
“What are you doing Maya? You are spoiling Yash. Raise him as an individual entity and let him grow and handle things on his own. He is no more a small child, give me some space. Even the moms of small children don’t follow their children as you do.” I said.
“It’s my love, Dear.” Maya said.
“This is not love, love gives freedom to be independent, this is your fear and it has made you over possessive. Even I love my children more than my life but have given space to grow and have made them so independent that even if I am not in house, they can manage themselves well.”
I told her the ways to handle growing child and how to make them independent.
As the child grows, start giving him responsibility and freedom to handle things on their own. They will learn through trial n error method and in that process they may keep you on toes to clean the mess but gradually they will pick up the habits and settle.
Once they start kindergarten, ask them to keep their tiffin & water bottle in their bags and while returning ask them to stack at the designated place.
This habit will help him to arrange their books in next classes and be methodical.
If the school is nearby, let them go by themselves when they reach the age of 10. At this age, they are matured to cross the road and manage themselves. Initially, if you have fears, follow them and watch how the child is managing and gradually wean him out of the habit.
Stop feeding them. Give them their food and let them eat on their own. Your work of cleaning may double initially but slowly, he will get into the habit.
Ask them to do their homework on their own. Help them where they stuck. Don’t provide the answers, teach the technique to reach at the answer, this way the child will use his brain and be independent.
Teach them activity of outside world too with age.
Slowly teach them how to interact at Post offices, Doctor’s Clinic, Banks etc. They will learn how to transact and will become independent and confident.
Teach them to iron their school uniforms and arrange their bags and beds.
They will grow into confident individuals and you too will have time to pursue your hobbies or take rest after hectic schedule.
Maya understood my point and promised that she will abide by the same and transform Yash to a confident and independent child.
Moms…ensure to teach your child the practical life and make them independent in thought and actions and guide them on the right track to ascertain their happy future.
Pic Credits: here